This is who I really am.

This week's Music Monday is "Life Must Go On" by Alter Bridge. The thing I love about Alter Bridge is that their songs have a lot of emotion to them. Myles Kennedy writes in the same way that Raine Maida of Our Lady Peace that really hits every part of me. There are songs about dealing with loss, addiction, determination and depression. Some songs are heavier than others. Some are deeper than others. This song is very deep and yet not really heavy musically. I think Myles is just an amazing songwriter and has a voice that can reflect all of the emotions that are in his lyrics. I picked this song for a friend that I haven't been in touch with lately. This person is going through a rough time right now. Someone that always seemed so strong living a nightmare and struggling to handle everything. I'm sure this person is strong enough to endure. In fact I know it. But sometimes even the strong need to reminded that they can get through anything.

This week's Music Monday is a triple feature. Perfect song for my problem..... What should happen. (Minus the violence of course).... What will likely happen. (It always does)...... So, the dilemma is that there is an issue. Probably just a simple miscommunication. Do I stand up and fight because I know I am not wrong? Or do I give up just like I always have? Giving up has always made everything better. But when is it time to say "enough is enough"?

This week's Music Monday is "Coeur d'Alene" by Alter Bridge. This song is about a lake near where the lead singer Myles Kennedy lives. It's a place where he goes to get away from everything and find peace. Listening to it makes me think about the place I go to "get away". That place for me is a long run. A long run for me is ten miles or more. There is something therapeutic about a long run. I can work out a lot of problems when I am out there. I know I am gonna be by myself for at least an hour and a half. I can do a lot of thinking.....or I can think about nothing. I can always tell when I need a long run. I get really frustrated easily, very irritable. I know my mind needs it even more than my body. Right now I have a something that is really bothering me. Something that I am dealing with internally that I haven't told anyone about. Right now I need a long run. I know that when I get one in I will hopefully get some clarity on the issu...

I'm finally getting a chance to catch up on my most recent races. The 1st MRTC Road Race Series 5K was actually a couple weeks ago but I didn't get around to posting about it until now. The 5Ks this year are at Audubon Park near the Cancer Memorial on Perkins. I ran with Staci because it is fun to get out and run with her. We never get a chance to run together during the week so it is a great opportunity for us. Also, we were without the kids for a few days so we could really enjoy each other's company. The other reason I ran with her is because she was having some foot issues. It was her right foot. So I figured since her right foot was bad and my left knee was bad we could run side by side in case we needed to lean on each other to finish. Our time was 35:54. Not bad considering she hadn't run outside much leading up to it and she was being really tough dealing with her new ailment. She did have a nice strong finish as we got to the last tenth ...

This week's Music Monday is "Firework" by Katy Perry. I picked this song for my daughter Sophie. This is her favorite song. And it is the perfect song for her. She is the middle child and she has, well....."The Middle Child Syndrome". She has probably the worst personality for her place among our children. She has a hard time dealing with the fact that she is not quite old enough to do the things Nate does and not baby enough to get treated like Olivia. But what she doesn't understand is that she is as special to us as her siblings. Each of our kids are very special to us. Sophie is the princess. She is a "firework". She has a different personality than Staci and I. She has a different personality from the other two kids. This song is great for her because it has a great positive message. I hope when she gets older she will realize what it means. I want her to understand that she is, and always will be, special and that she only needs to ...

This week's Music Monday is "Breathe" by Seven Channels. This is "one of those songs". One that I listen to that expresses my emotion of missing my father. Sunday night as I was getting myself ready to go back to work after a week of vacation I started thinking about how happy I was being a father. This song kept popping up in my head. One other thing kept sticking in my head: "are you proud of me Daddy?" That was my 5 year old daughter as I was teaching her to ride her bike with no training wheels. As this song kept playing in my head right along with Sophie's question, I stopped and wondered...."are you proud of me Daddy?"

This week's Music Monday is "Let The Sparks Fly" by Thousand Foot Krutch. This is Nate and Sophie's new favorite song. They lose their freaking minds every time they hear it! The song is exactly the kind of music Nate likes. It's high energy and has a positive message. Sophie loves the parts when the lead singer sings with a higher pitched voice. They both love the "gimme 1....gimme2....gimme3" count.  We went to watch my niece play softball last week and they didn't want to get out of the car until the song was over! Reminds me of the way my sister and I acted when we were kids with my dad. Watching them through the rearview mirror helps me remember the way my dad would smile at us with great love. Enjoy!

I finally got the chance to run for the first time in over two months. And it was AWESOME! I got the "all clear" on Friday but somehow waited until Monday to get out and run. Going in, I had a little bit of fear. Really just little silly worries: will the knee be ok, will I get shin splints, will I remember how to run, will I be terribly slow, will I have to - gulp - walk. Monday afternoon was the perfect time to get that first run. I couldn't think of any better way to get going than my favorite running weather: hot-as-balls! The temperature had to have been over 90. I know a lot of people don't like running when it's that hot but I love it. It really make me pay more attention to my body and how efficient I am. As I was getting ready to go outside my kids asked where I was going. Of course they all wanted to go but the girls just can't make it but my son can ride his bike right along with me. Those are some of my favorite runs wh...

This week's Music Monday is "Bully" by Shinedown. This song lashes out against bullying. It has more than one special meaning for me. I've been bullied. I've bullied others. I've had others close to me be bullies or bullied. I have kids that I fear may be bullied or be bullies themselves. When I was in middle school I was bullied. This kid harassed me, and others, at school. He would call me at home and harass me. He would beat up his sister while he was on the phone with me. I really never knew how to handle the situation. Finally when we got to high school he became less of a bully to me because there were less opportunities because we had less classes together and I think he was a little intimidated by the upperclassmen. I think he also realized that girls didn't like that stuff and like all teenage boys he wanted attention from girls. From what I can tell about him now he is not anywhere near the person he was back then. To him: I truly regret that...

This week's Music Monday Wednesday is "Sweet Child O' Mine" performed by Fergie and Slash. My usual routine is to write my Music Monday on Sunday night/Monday morning. However, I did not have time this week so I planned to do it Monday night. However, my 19 month old (Olivia) got sick and had a febrile seizure so we were with her in the emergency room until 2:30 am. It was very scary but everything checked out and she is fine. So I picked this song for my "little blue-eyed devil." When I looked up the song on Youtube I found this live version with Fergie. Enjoy!

This week's Music Monday is "The Fire" by Rev Theory. This song was brought to my attention by someone very close to me. It is about a couple we know very well. The past year for this couple have been the worst for them. At a time when they should be the happiest, they have not been. They have been selfish, jealous, mean, hateful........almost completely unhappy and at times looked like they were ready to separate. A lot of the words and feelings in this song have been expressed between these two. Recently things have been better for them. They have been spending more time together and seem to be finding "the fire" they had been missing. Hopefully for them 2012 will be much better than 2011. Enjoy!

It's taken nearly a month but I am finally getting to my St. Jude Marathon recap. I wanted to wait at least a week so the recap wouldn't have to break it into several posts. Everything about the marathon was great. I think I smiled the entire 4:34:23. The organizers do a great job getting people to volunteer and there are tons of people lining the streets cheering. Everyone involved from start to finish is great. Everyone makes you feel like they are there for you. Even the people cheering for their family and friends cheer for you. It is an unbelievable feeling. I am so thankful for everyone that donated to St. Jude through my Heroes program. My total amount raised was $576. Wearing the Heroes shirt this year was an honor. I can't imagine ever running this race without being a part of this awesome program. It really gave me a little extra pride knowing that I was doing this for more than myself. Running 26.2 miles isn't the most fun thing to do but doing it to ...

This week's Music Monday is "Turn the Page" by Bob Seger. Back in September I did a post here  about a Bob Seger song that means a lot to me. In it I told the story of how I always wanted to go to his concert. Well, just a couple weeks after I wrote that I got an email from Ticketmaster that said that he was playing in Memphis in December. This time I was going! The concert was great. It was everything I expected it to be. He put on an awesome show. It was also really cool that my mom and my sister were there. I seriously felt my dad's presence there with me. I had chills the whole concert. It really helped that there were a bunch of drunk people around me to keep me from freaking out that I was finally doing something that I have wanted to do since I was a kid. This is a song that I love to listen to when I am on a long run. It is a song about him being a musician on the road. I kinda relate it to being on a long run. Out there in the spotlight You'r...

This week's Music Monday is "Fall to Pieces" by Velvet Revolver. This is a very special song for me. It is a song that reminds me of how I have always handled my father's death. I have always been someone who would not really share what is bothering me. This is especially true when it comes to talking about this. My father passed when I was nine so I really had a hard time dealing with it as a kid/teenager/adult. I could always talk to my mother or my sister but I felt the need to deal with it on my own. As I got older it was even harder dealing with it. I remember a couple of times as a young adult when I just completely broke down when talking about it. (If you were one of those people that I confided in, thank you for listening.) The chorus - "Every time I'm falling down, All alone I fall to pieces" - struck me the first time I heard it. It really captures that feeling that I had for so many years. The feeling of keeping everything inside and de...

Sunday was the last 10k of the MRTC Road Race Series. It was also the last race that Staci will be doing together in this series. Our time was 1:14:29, which was two minutes slower that the last race. But once again it was Staci's first run since the last race two weeks ago. So I would say she did great. She has gotten better each race and I think she actually likes it a little. Maybe a little more after the race is over. We both really enjoyed the time together during our races and it stinks that we won't have anymore to do together. I am kinda excited to get back to being competitive in the 10 milers and half marathons. However it will be much different without her by my side. I am dissapointed that we didn't follow through on my idea of getting "I'm with stupid" t-shirts to run in during the races. That would have been freaking hilarious. I really wanted to do this series without getting too competitive since I am training for my marathon. Running w...

This week's Music Monday is Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock & Roll". This song is very special to me because it is me and my Dad's song. When I was younger, probably 8 or 9, we would listen to the Bob Seger "Nine Tonight" tape all the time. It is a "live" album and one of my all-time favorites. Any time we would go somewhere I would ask him to play it. I always wanted to hear this song but those of you old enough to remember tapes know that it was not easy to just go to a song. So we would listen to the whole tape and turn it up when this song came on. I remember my parents being pretty big Bob Seger fans. I remember once they went to his concert and me and my sister had to spend the night with a family friend. I was pretty upset that I didn't get to go. I couldn't wait to see my dad and ask him all about it. "How was it?" "What songs did he play?" "How many people were there?" "Were there any kids ...

Sunday was the first 10k race of the MRTC Road Race Series. It was also my birthday. What better way to spend my birthday than to get to run through Shelby Farms with my wonderful wife. She does not consider herself a runner so the fact that she is doing this series to spend time with me is very unselfish and sweet. Once again we ran together because it is so much fun. However, we both went in a little nervous. She hadn't run in two weeks, since the last 5 miler. I hadn't run all week because of a very scary knee pain. It was scary because 1. I am a wuss and 2. everyone I talked to had a look on their face like "it might be serious" when I told them about it. It started immediately after my 12 miler last Sunday. It never fully went away. Tuesday I tried running on it and the first step was terrible. I rested it until Friday but it still hurt a little when I took off. So after I ran a few feet I decided to wait until Sunday. There is no way I am missing a race in thi...

I just recently got my tattoo finished and added a few. I already had the letter N with my wife and kid's names in it. I just added the latest (and last!) addition to our family and added a crest. The N was pretty plain for a reason. I really wanted to get a tattoo with the names in an N but I really wasn't sure how I wanted it to look. I went to a shop and the guy that helped me didn't really help me much at all. But I knew I at least wanted the names and the N because the names line up perfectly. The two Ss line up and the two Es line up. I decided that I could get that and finish it later somewhere else. Probably a good idea. I kinda toyed with ideas for what I wanted to do and got close to getting it done. And then the surprise. We had Olivia. So now I have to find a way to get her name on it. The idea for her name came from a hat my Grandfather had given me a few years ago from our family reunion. The second N in my last name has a tilde above it. The hat had one o...

This week's race in the MRTC Road Race Series was the second 5 miler. And just like the first one, this race was really fun. Staci and I ran together again. This time we took over a minute off of our time from 59:06 to 58:04. We only stopped to walk at the two water stops. The first stop was at mile 2 and the second stop was at mile 4. I was so proud of Staci because she just kept pushing. I shouldn't be surprised though. After all she is an athlete. Running is my sport. Running is exercise for her sport (volleyball). The best part of the race was the last 3/4 of a mile. A lady running beside us said "you two are gonna beat me again. I have been trying to catch you the whole race." She also told us we had a good pace. (And no I did not take credit for that, haha.) Staci picked it up a little and we didn't see that nice little lady again. After we passed a few other people we came up on a couple about a tenth of a mile from the finish line. And yeah, we smoke...

Saturday was the Munford Celebrate 5k. This was my third year to run this race and each year has been fun.  The course has several small hills throughout-which I love. My only problem is that my usual training course is completely flat. However, I do enough hill training that these hills really aren't that bad. It is usually pretty hot on race day (again something I love) but this year was not too bad. The people that put it on are really awesome. And to make things even better there is a Kid's Fun Run after the 5k. This year I ran into a small dilemma. After a horrible long run on Sunday, my 1year old was sick on Tuesday and Wednesday. I had some pretty hard workouts planned for those days. I made the mistake of doing them both on Thursday....two days before the race. That meant sore hamstrings and shoulders for a couple days. I was over all of that by Saturday morning and actually felt pretty good after I stretched. I got a chance to see a few people I hadn't seen i...